Personal Survival Guide for Suffolk University Part 1

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Its  your last day in your home town on a warm summer day. You’re saying goodbyes to your friends who you are literally going to be seeing in TWO WHOLE MONTHs during Thanksgiving break but you still are crying? Alright well your first day of school is tomorrow. You have  been creeping on your roommate/ roommates all summer through Instagram and Facebook, and praying they are not an only child ( only childs SUCK ).

You might be asking yourself, where should I live? Well that question has one answer…..

soon

ONE FIFTY TREMONT

One fifty fucks. One fifty parties. One fifty is your only hope, especially living in a suite like pictured above. The suites have a common room where you have a couch, a few chairs, a place for a TV, Playstation etc., basically where you can hangout so you’re not stranded in one room with another stranger staring at each other all day because your beds are three feet apart. One fifty is the most social dorm by far. There are 11 floors and two suites on each floor, plus the most social cafeteria so if you want to meet people this is exactly where you go. Also a rule of thumb, never trust your RA, but be friendly to them so that you can host occasional pregames before you hit that china town restaurants with those Connecticut and Ohio fakes  you just ordered from IDGod.com. And no that pubic hair on your face that you’re calling a beard isn’t fooling any of the bouncers at fanuel hall. They’ll take that shit real quick.

Besides One fifty you have a few other options. You have 10 West, Modern Theatre, and the dreaded Miller Hall……

Whatever you do, do not end up in Miller fucking Hall. In Miller Hall you’ll be watching your highschool friends doing keg stands at Umass Amherst on snapchat while your reading about micro economics while your roommate is playing classical music off their laptop “because it helps them concentrate.” There is zero life at Miller Hall. It’s like a dorm room for librarians. If you live in Miller Hall, you are going to either cry, transfer, dropout, or join the peace corps because spending more than two weeks there is hell on earth, and plus no one likes Miller kids.

After a few weeks you’ve established your own squad, your own clique. Everyone’s super friendly. You’re thinking I love everybody here. WRONG. WRONG AS FUCK. At first everyone may seem all nice and dandy but this will soon change, people’s true colors come out, and you start to realize there’s a lot of shitty people at Suffolk. But luckily you have me to help weave them out so you can find your true few, the ones who will have your back, the ones who you’ll call first when you need to get bailed out of jail, the ones who will one day be your groomsmen.canada goose

Warning Sign Number One

The classic Canada Goose. I’m not saying every shitty Suffolk kid wears this, but everyone I’ve met who wears one of these has been pretty shitty. This is a huge red flag. These kids parents are most likely own some Hedge fund and vacation in Guam half the year so if you want to sell your soul they may be good acquaintances but other than that they should be avoided. These jackets cost more or less $1,000 so its materialism at its finest. Plus this company isn’t the most ethical around.

Very hard video to watch but I guess it doesn’t matter if it looks cool!

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Warning Sign Number Two

If your peers around you are constantly bragging about Bijou it might be time to get new friends. Don’t get me wrong Bijou has the best speaker system in all of New England, but the crowd it brings in is unbearable. You have these kids spending $1,000 each for a seat at a table, 3 nights a week or more. Its insane. I’ve had my few times spent at this club and the kids with the tables are just sitting there watching, not even dancing, they honestly look sad.

So my advice to you is use them free electives. Take a creative writing class. Take a video production class, journalism, just take a class where you will at least meet people of substance and atleast interesting. Just don’t end up another brick in the wall.

Also Follow me on instagram @somedrunkwriter and twitter @jlindahl1 and Snap Jlindahl1

Part Two will be coming out either this Friday or next Monday. Peace Bitches!

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